Man Card Check - almost lost mine

The man card. Every man acquires one at birth but certain actions can revoke the privileges of said card. Such as:

• selfies

This is immediate revocation. Exceptions are if the man is 10,000 feet above sea level on a ski hill, has just caught a record fish or the Swedish bikini team is in the background at the hotel pool (said bikini team had better be in the picture).

via Strava; this man has no penis and apparently likes taking pictures of himself

• fruit in beer

This can also be lumped in with any light beer (why bother?) or the three foot fruit drinks at the ball game. It just exudes "wuss" (not a word).

• can't change a tire

I haven't had to take the re-test on this subject in awhile; knock on wood. I am guessing its been about 30 years since my last tire change. My main obstacle these days would be not having my reader glasses available to read the manual. 

• don't open a car door for a woman

Such a simple task fellas but I see more than enough not doing it. Put her on a pedestal.

• Tiffany comes up on your music player shuffle

Yes, I have a friend, who shall be nameless, have it in there at one time. He claims his old female roommate loaded it on there. His appeal is still under investigation.

• can't wire a stereo/tv/dvd

This leads us to my story. One thing in college you get good at besides rationalizing is wiring electronics as you are moving so damn much. The process is pretty simple; match the colors and put the 'in' cord in the 'in' hole and the 'out' in the 'out' hole. So my mom recently purchased a sound bar for her television and asked me to help install it. No worries I thought. Everything was plugged in properly according to the manual, we went step by step in synchronizing the sound bar to the subwoofer, the lights flashed on and off as they were supposed to and....nothing. I checked the connections again, re-synch....nothing. I was stumped. My man card was crumbling in my wallet. I would not be denied, however. It must have been the meal (which was delicious, as always) but the light bulb finally went off after dinner. Logic would think that the sound bar would be connected through the television but the cable box had the same input hole; we plugged it there and bingo!!!!

Man Card on.

Trail Head

FINALLY got that sound bar to work