It was 28 years ago today that I was getting ready to start working for my current employer on October 1st, 1990. The Lions probably lost that day as well. Looking back at my vast (VERY vast) history of tasks I did to make a buck, go figure in that I've lasted 28 years with the same company. With that, we queue the way back machine to 1980-something for a tour of my buck retrieving tasks:
allowance
Everyone's job history starts with the allowance. Your parents assigned tasks and you got X amount of dollars each week. My sis, bro and I sucked down soda pops like you have never seen back in the day so that was pretty much our payment. We drank; we drank a lot. We seriously had a soda pop allocation. I was a crappy lawn cutter to boot.
baling hay
Working for friend Jim's dad Del, one of the toughest jobs I've ever had but sure built some character and work ethic. It's 90 degrees (110 slinging bales in the top of the barn) but you can't wear
shorts or a tank top as the hay bales will seriously scratch your skin. With that, you have jeans and a long sleeve shirt and are sweating like you've never sweated before. But at 14-16 years old, we were the energizer bunnies before the phrase even existed. The bonus of the job is Jim's mom Arlene can cook up some outstanding grub so we had that going for us.
Big Boy
The first job where I received a formal paycheck but wasn't even making minimum wage (serious). The bus boy/dishwasher is a thankless job and
there are some serious pigs out there that you unfortunately have to clean up after. Needless to say, I don't think I lasted a month before I went to a different job that was equally crap.
McDonalds
Milford High classmate Randy G. talked me into this one as he worked there. Randy hopefully is in sales today as he somehow sold me on the satisfaction of flipping burgers. There was no satisfaction as standing in front of an extremely hot grill for four hours sucked ass. In addition, I was being told to 'pick it up' by another classmate that I had no respect for. Another classmate, Joe H., somehow crossed paths with me one day and fate would have it that he was leaving his job and asked if I'd be interested. Which leads us to the next job; my job of all jobs.
Kensington golf course
Xanadu. The best job ever. I was a golf course ranger. The main task obviously is to make sure the foursome on the back nine are not lollygagging. Golfers start early so I was out there by 6 AM doing a loop around the course, filling up ball washers, changing ball washer towels and admiring the many deer hanging out. The day would end with the very difficult chore (insert sarcasm) of vacuuming the clubhouse where hot dogs were free for me (along with the golf) and the girls working the clubhouse grill were not too bad on the eyes.
Botsford Inn
I went to MSU initially for the hotel/restaurant program and working at a respected hotel went hand in hand with that vision. I worked all aspects of the hotel/banquet scene. After the summer was over I decided that the hotel/restaurant world wasn't for me. Some great people there though.
political surveys
College jobs. There were many. I didn't work when I went to CMU but this was my first at State. I hate any calls for solicitors and these were the worst. The office was in downtown Lansing and you had a script you had to complete to consider the call successful so you talked as fast as possible before the person on the other end hung up. I was calling people in Pennsylvania asking for their viewpoints on candidates that I had no idea who they were.
plasma donations
Yep, my plasma was donated extensively in East Lansing. There was a clinic right in town and gave you $25 a week for donating. You brought your school books and did some reading while they were extracting. Back in the day, $25 could be stretched quite extensively if you worked the $1 pitcher special nights at various locations. Not going to happen today with the $7 pints as being a 'special'.
old lady chores
I worked for an elderly lady in East Lansing for a couple months who somehow found something for me to do each day. No, I did not do what you are thinking you dirty mind.
Country Market
Bagging groceries and sorting bottle returns. The owner Charlie was a great person but his head manager Frank lacked some people skills (never missed a meal though; he was huge). I think I lasted two months there with bagging groceries for MSU football great Lorenzo White as my highlight with a home run for the Country Market softball team a close second (first at bat to boot).
landscaping
I finally found my lawn cutting skill working for a family business out of Okemos that did lawn cutting and lawn seeding prep for the many homes being built in the area. A good job in that I got to work on my tan but the drawback is the owner paid once a month. Give a college kid X amount of dollars once a month and how long do you think it will last? Not very long for this scribe.
dorm cleaning
Summer school money. Not too glamorous throwing down some serious chemicals trying to de-funk the mojo the students left behind in the dorm showers from the past year.
selling college books
Found money. There is no better feeling once that last final exam was done and your 3 pound biology book brought in $30. No peanut butter sandwiches and Busch beer tonight. We're going with Budweiser and Westside Deli slices!!
Financial Services of America
After trying to get my foot into the advertising world that my undergraduate degree emphasized (and not getting anything), I interviewed and received a position working here. My shortest employment of one day as the head guy seemed shady (and ended up getting busted for his shadiness).
Action Auto Rental
The niche of the company (that I don't think is in business anymore) was that the rental car was delivered to your home or business. The employee drove the rental car while towing a GEO Metro behind it. You deliver the rental car to the customer, unhook the Metro and drive it away. The manager in the area had a habit of calling everyone 'bud' so he lost me quite quickly there. My highlight was during rush hour one hot summer afternoon, I managed to flip two cars at one time. I hit the brakes on the rental car I was driving pretty hard and the Metro that I was towing swung around and pulled both cars over. Good times. Yep, didn't last too long there.
parade company
Thanks to my sister for this one as while a seasonal job, what a great group of people. Mechanically declined Tim got to help build the floats for the annual Detroit Thanksgiving parade. Pretty cool seeing something you help build appear on television.
So to my friends out there who have kids just out of college and are starting to jump into the post college working world, patience.
Trail Head
I was in Charlotte, NC this past week for work and a post work walk back to my hotel brought me to a few locations that had more beer choices than humanly possible. A four page book at one stop. It gives the places a nice "over 100 beers on tap" label but the bartenders tell me that maybe a quarter of the choices get used with the others getting put in the 'special' category in hopes to move them with a discount. It got my large melon to delve into the many, many, many beer selections out there; while of course enjoying a cold one while I delved. I personally enjoy a Fat Tire on draft and a Bud if we are going can. And don't even think about sending a light beer my way. Seriously though, there are only so many variations of beer possible if you leave out the fruit/funky mixtures; yet so many are attempting to make the next 'new' ale. Many attempts at the IPA were on display which I personally believe the 'P' stands for piss-water as they all go down bad. Fruit and beer mixtures are almost reincarnating the wine cooler with a beer label; if that makes sense. I don't want to harp on the entrepreneurs or the beer snobs but the game of beer musical chairs is on and there isn't even close to enough chairs. It is a crowded room and might want to keep your hobby in the garage with beer festival appearances (love a good beer festival) and not give up that day job just yet. 
