The godfather of the insurance industry passed this week, off to the AAA office in the sky, selling hell protection to anyone and everyone with a free John Reeves pen to all! My Dad will be missed, that is for sure.
As his son, I had been preparing for this moment about a decade ago when he was diagnosed with Alzheimer's/Dementia. It's up to me to tell his friends and family his story; the eulogy. Anytime I thought of some story from whenever, out came my phone and would make a few notes about it to jog my memory when it came time to compile the master story compilation. It's easy to compile stories and public speaking was not going to be a problem as I've done many presentations over the years. Emotions, however, cannot be understated. You can try your best but if you're crying, those stories are not coming out.
You can't let the dude down who did so much for you so cry I would not. In preparation, I went to a place where everything is the truth (insert sarcasm), the information superhighway. I entered "how not to cry during a eulogy" and got some good pointers and added a few of my own:
- Breath, breath, breath. Key. Once that hyperventilating starts, its all downhill.
- Practice, practice, practice. I talk to myself at home anyway so I got to hear the speech a few times.- Liquid nearby. Check. Dry mouth and speech do not mix.
- Write the eulogy/summary but don't read it verbatim. Tell a story. You don't have to hide behind the podium either. Give the story some action.
- Get a good cry in when you're writing the eulogy. Check.
- Check your crowd beforehand and identify the known crier. Do NOT look towards said person when you're talking.
- Get in the sports/competitive mindset and make it a game you really want to win and will not be denied. A mission to get the stories told.
- Your Dad is counting on you. Enough said.
I've also had the good fortune to be friends of two of the greatest story tellers of their time, Jim M. and Gus. Jim likes working the larger crowds (he's available for wedding toasts) while Gus can work a story for a group of 10 or fewer like none other. I channeled both of their abilities on Tuesday.
I am happy to report that the stories got told and the pride of Detroit Cathedral Central got the proper send off.
Enjoy your unlimited mulligans Dad.
Trail Head
